Film Review - The Contagious Man

The Contagious Man is a variation on the Fugitive. Whereas in the Fugitive, Harrison Ford played a man being hunted by Tommy Lee Jones’ US Marshal; here our man on the run is the carrier of a deadly and highly contagious disease which will kill anyone who comes into contact with him within an hour.

Robocop plays a German who has been working for the same chemical firm for 22 years. He is laid off and whilst trying to find out why, inadvertently causes a skirmish with security that results in his exposure to a deadly chemical.

In the cat role of this cat and mouse caper is Captain Caveman. Captain Caveman used to work for the same chemical firm until exposure to the very same chemical. He unknowingly infected his wife and child, killing them both. He swapped sides and now works as an inspector who basically wanders round quarantining whatever he wants.

The female cat, in this cats and mouse caper is Natalya Zvereva, former Wimbledon women’s and mixed doubles champion. Her part is strangely restricted, as she is quarantined by Captain Caveman in an early scene, when he catches her drinking diet coke.

While the premise of this film has potential, it is ultimately disappointing as it soon boils down to a man-hunt. Your enjoyment will be strictly related to your love of man-machine crime-fighting hybrids and your ability to withstand the sight of someone leaping into the air and hovering whilst shouting their own name and continually hammering the floor with a giant club.

Every now and again other characters appear, but without exception they are all quarantined by Captain Caveman for the most spurious reasons. One unsuspecting government operative is entombed in a plastic tent for looking a little bit like a rat; another for cackling maniacally, earlier in the week; and a train driver is even hauled out of his engine for digesting food in an irregular manner. Quite what this brings to the film, I failed to see.

All in all, this isn’t worth the paper it’s printed on (it comes in flick-book form with an accompanying audio tape).