Film Review - Splash

Sometimes you watch a film and it terrifies you to your very soul. This is one of those films.

Never in the history of cinema has there been such a terrifying concept. What sadistic movie mogul gave this the green light? It's crass irresponsibility of the highest order. Some of us have to sleep at nights. Whoever was responsible for this chilling opus surely hasn't slept since they made that fateful decision.

This film is about a woman who's part-fish.

It doesn't get any more horrendous than that. She's a woman. And she's a fish. She's a fish. But she's a woman. She's fish where she should be legs and she's human-face where she should be gills. It's so shocking my grammar's gone out of the window.

All I can think about is that macabre scaly waist and that full-lipped fish mouth. It's worse than that time when that guy punched that other guy by accident and didn't say sorry.